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Member since May 2011 · 2462 posts · Location: Brisbane
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Subject: Current Console Roundup
There's been some weird news out of the gaming press lately, some of which is baffling, nonsensical or just plain weird.

First off, one of every twenty Xbox 360 users is a filthy pirate or a cheat, and Microsoft has cut them off.  According to CNN, some of them were cut off just because they were dicks.  I am not sure it ever makes sense to cut off five percent of your userbase, especially since they're paying for the Live privilege.  What a strange world.

Quote by Nintendo's Iwata:
"The Wii has stalled.

Of course, given the recent admissions from both Nintendo and Sony that their systems are basically stalling, perhaps Microsoft believes they can fuck their userbase without serious repercussions.  Of course, admitting your system is sucking is one thing, but coming up with bullshit reasons like no HD output is quite another, IMO.  No one really cares that their console is 'only' 480p, do they?  I'd argue that they're more upset all the Wii games totally suck.  Typical Nintendo, strong out of the gate and then they look around, wondering where they should be going.  Sony's PS3, meanwhile, has such a tiny section of any of the gameshops near me that I wonder why they bother at all.

That's OK though, 'cause Sony has a plan, and it involves copying everyone else just like they've always done.  Now that MS is including facebook functions with the 360, So is Sony.

And geez you guys, the Wii has hit a plateau and now you're trying to emulate that rocket-like climb to mediocrity?  Both Sony and Microsoft are launching ridiculous motion controllers, and I gotta say that the only way I could be less interested is if they were pink and had little thorns where your hands go.  Of course, Microsoft's Natal probably won't cause too much pain for black people, since it doesn't work with them anyway.

As far as I'm concerned peripherals that don't ship with the console will never see widespread adoption.  Both Sony and Microsoft are still stinging from Nintendo's strong initial performance, and trying to follow the leader even though the Wii isn't leading anymore.  Nintendo's "Reggie Fils-Aime is unconcerned about motion control solutions from Sony and Microsoft", and for good reason: the Wii is faltering in spite of their own controls, so much like a cold-war arms race, MS and Sony are just throwing money away, chasing a phantom leader.

Oh, I got a chance to play with a PSPgo last night.  I am old and cynical and jaded, something to keep in mind when I  say that the PSPgo was a piece of shit.  It's sooo cheap-feeling.  The dpad was clicky and annoying, and when you slide it closed your game doesn't pause or anything.  Poorly executed, poorly made and, basically, rubbish.

Wii fit doesn't make you fit.  Probably better for you than sitting on the couch, but you're playing video games.  Wii Fit is still a failure on that front - Yoshi's Island is a way better game, and you're still burning fully half the calories.

Bah.  It's all so pathetic.  No wonder I'm playing Saturn games more than anything else recently.
BLEARGH
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Member since May 2011 · 2462 posts · Location: Brisbane
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Here's a couple of interesting updates.  ARS reports that Microsoft has opened up a nice new market of people selling their suddenly-offline-only 360 consoles.  I sure hope this doesn't turn into a money-making opportunity for MS as people replace their consoles with ones that work.  Instead I hope all these people invest in voodoo dolls and curses, to heap upon the jackasses at Microsoft.

Also Microsoft related, Fudzilla says we can expect Natal in twelve months, and it's likely to cost $50 - $80.  Motion capture sucks.  I didn't care when Sony released the EyeToy, I don't care about Natal.  GRR!  Angry!
BLEARGH
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Member since May 2011 · 2462 posts · Location: Brisbane
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Nintendo totally denies they're planning an HD Wii system.  Of course they do.  They'd never admit it if they were doing it, and it's such a daft idea they're probably, actually, NOT thinking about it.

In DRM news...  If you own a DSi, you're at Nintendo's mercy if you ever break the system and need to move your games to the new one.  I just took an informal poll, and 100% of the respondents (ie: me) agreed that wave-of-the-future or not, this DRM bullshit where consumers rely on the benevolence of the publishers is complete rubbish.  Fuck them.

GamaSutra says Modern Warfare 2 caused a major drop in XBLA purchases, but admit there's probably something to be said about Microsoft banning 5% of their userbase at the same time.  I think Microsoft needs to be reminded that few things cause your customers to wake up with a jolt like when they're told they do not, in fact, control the stuff they bought.
BLEARGH
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Member since May 2011 · 2462 posts · Location: Brisbane
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Microsoft says they don't know where the million users number came from:

Quote by Microsoft:
"We didn’t release the number. I cannot explain to you why people would think it was a million people," Xbox Live GM Mark Whitten told VentureBeat. "It wasn’t a million people. Check the veracity of that claim. It was one news source."

Well, that's good then.

Nintendo's had success with their DSi LL launch.  The large-screen DSi system sold over 100,000 units for the first two days.  This compares very favourably to the PSPgo, which sold 28,000.  Bahaha.  =D

Compare the DSi LL to the PSP:
[Image: /grafx/games/DSiLL-PSP.jpg]

That screen is MASSIVE.  Check it vs a regular DSi:

[Image: /grafx/games/DSiLL-DSi.jpg]

It kinda pisses me off they removed the GBA slot, and I really don't have a lot of interest in region-locked downloadable games, but wow.  That's a sexy, man-sized little system.
BLEARGH
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Member since May 2011 · 2462 posts · Location: Brisbane
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Nintendo dropped the price of the Wii, and it seems to have worked: over half a million units shifted last week.  PS3 sold a record amount as well, as fools lined up to buy a console for which, for the life of me, I can't see any good games on.

Of course the DS/DSi combo sold over a million in that timeframe.  Too bad the DS market's so glutted with rubbish games.

And in other fascinating news, the Wii can be emulated and you can now play New Super Mario Bros Wii in 1080p:

double-click to view the original on YouTube.com

It ain't fast, but it works.  I am rather surprised to see this.
BLEARGH
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Member since May 2011 · 2462 posts · Location: Brisbane
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Microsoft loves being in control, and they're easily demonstrating now why I have trouble with authority, especially arbitrary authority in control of the things I paid for: they're banning people who exploit a bug in a game.  They're not doing something that you might somehow rationalize as acceptable, like modding a console or copying a DVD or skinning live cats and posting the results on 4chan.  No, they're doing something that the game's developer was too incompetent to notice and fix before release.  I dunno guys, trying to mandate polite behaviour by cutting off your customers seems...  Well it seems like a good goddamned idea in a society filled with griefing dickheads, but somehow I still think it's wrong.

Meanwhile, in PSPgo land, Logitech's planning a UMD drive for the retards who bought a PSPgo.  I guess someone has to think of the customers when Sony won't.  Seems odd that Logitech would release a peripheral for a system that's selling about four units a week though.
BLEARGH
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