WoW made me sad.

| #PC | #whinge | #wow |

When World of Warcraft came out I was hyped. I plopped for the deluxe set with the deluxe case and the collector’s hardcover book and cloth map and soundtrack and I was hyped when it finally arrived. I was ready for it and I was completely enraptured with it. At first it was everything I wanted: online gaming that was ping-tolerant (being in Japan sucked for overseas gaming), varied and fun. Lots of varied quests, lots of new things to see. I was playing first with one then another good friends, and it was great fun. I have a directory stuffed with screenshots I took every time I entered a new area.

And then the suckage started in: after level twenty the game ceased being something you could play solo, or with one friend. Everything required a team, all the experience was in dungeons and a team of two was lambs to the slaughter.

I wanted to keep playing, I did. Finding a team was frustrating as all hell. There were three types of players: the fast levellers who were winding their fourth character of the week up to level sixty, and wanted you to back them up, the retards who, because of mental deficiency, were as bad for your health as the monsters, and useless tits who couldn’t be counted on to show up when they said they would. There was a fourth type too, the type who was literate, friendly, and willing to do their share for the team. So I hear – they only seem to exist in other people’s copies of the game, or on servers I couldn’t find.

I spent a lot of money on WoW, pestered two friends to find me the game and then use their visa to pay for my account when Blizzard refused me ’cause I was in Japan. And, after all that, I got a social game populated with morons and illiterate teens. Every time I needed to complete a quest it was in an area filled with Alliance players who, at level sixty, had nothing better to do than kill me, a lowly level 22 player. One hit and I’m dead, I’m stuck walking for five minutes just to get completely crushed again by the next level sixty moron with nothing else to do. And then, assuming I survived, I found my quest involved a dungeon where I’d die without a larger team.

Where is the WoW I read about on Penny Arcade or PvP? They say guilds are cool, but all the guilds I joined split for other servers in short order, or were focused on repetitive mining or crafting to earn money for horses I wasn’t high-level enough to use. I’m sad, and I’m jealous – they’re playing a game I remember wanting desperately but hated playing. And thanks to Blizzard’s no-transfer policy I can’t even sell my copy of the game.

[ Sep 13 2005 ]

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